User’s Guide: What the U.S. Embassy Wants You to Know

Read their brochure.

About three years ago, a small group of Americans walked up to the U.S. Embassy in Luxembourg and rang the buzzer to alert the guard. When he answered, they announced that they were there for dinner. It was Thanksgiving, after all, and they had heard that the Ambassador always prepared a large holiday feast for all U.S. citizens in the area.

While the U.S. Embassy offers a number of services to Americans living in Luxembourg, an all-you-can-eat Thanksgiving buffet is not one of them. (Though I definitely think they should reconsider this policy, don’t you?)

So just what is the Embassy good for, if not for a decent slice of turkey? I had the opportunity recently to sit down with David Fetter, the Embassy’s chargé d’affairs (i.e. the guy holding down the fort until the new Ambassador arrives in a week or so) and Dr. Stephanie Shaheen, the Embassy’s public affairs officer, to ask a few questions, like: When is it appropriate to go to the Embassy with a problem, and when it is not? How long should a person expect to wait for a response from the Embassy? and Why doesn’t the Embassy ever update its web site?

User’s Guide: Getting to Germany for a Klein Price

Over the past several months, I’ve shared tips for getting to Paris (and the rest of France) on the cheap, I’ve told you how to get to and from Luxembourg on Ryanair, and I’ve told you how to visit wineries in Provence via public bus.

Now, it’s Germany’s turn. And there are a lot of wunderbar deals to be had on the Deutsche Bahn (DB). Of course, the standard rule applies: the earlier you can book, the better your chances of scoring a cheaper ticket from Luxembourg. But there are several ways you can be creative about booking your travel, and several options for last minute trips from Luxembourg Ville.

User's Guide: Getting a Haircut

"Cousin Itt" (circled).

There comes a time when living in a new place that the thing you’ve been avoiding finally becomes inevitable. A time when you finally have to confront the fact that you’ll soon be confused with “Cousin Itt” if you don’t take action soon. And a time when it becomes painfully obvious to everyone that your natural hair color is not actually the lovely shade of sun-soaked golden brown that you hope people will think is natural.

Ladies: you know what I’m talking about. I’m talking about making a hair appointment.

Dialing for Dinner

A lovely view in Cascade, Idaho.

After 8 days, 6 cities, 3 states, two 10 hour flights and 1,000+ miles driving in a car through the great state of Idaho, I’m back. Nick and I spent the last week in the U.S. on a whirlwind tour visiting friends and family who promptly wore us out by dishing out great stories, stuffing us silly with American favorites, and showing us a truly terrific time in general. Just take a look at the incredible view to the right.

We landed at Findel yesterday morning and, by some minor miracle (i.e. a four hour afternoon nap); I actually managed to muster the energy to cook dinner last night. Because usually after returning home from any kind of out of town trip, this House Frau is first in line to suggest that we order in for dinner. So frequently, actually, that I’m a little embarrassed to tell you that I’m pretty sure the guys at Royal Bengal know my regular order.

Anyway, it took me a little while after moving here to discover that we actually could order food for delivery in Luxembourg, so I thought I’d share my growing list of restaurants that offer home delivery with those of you who are new to Luxembourg Ville. It’s so nice to have the option to not cook on those nights when you’re just back from a trip, when it’s raining, when walking around the corner to pick up take out just seems too far to walk, when it’s Wednesday…you catch my drift.

Le Chien a Mangé Mon Devoir (The Dog Ate My Homework)

Since moving to Luxembourg a little over a year ago, my French has gone from nonexistent to awful. And this is actually something I’m incredibly proud of! Hey, progress is progress.

When I moved here, I knew a few important words that had stuck in my memory from previous vacations, like s’il vous plait (please), merci (thank you), pardon (sorry), ou est le toilette (where is the bathroom) and un autre verre de vin, s’il vous plait (another glass of wine, please). But that was all. Hardly enough to live on in a country that only recognizes French, German and Luxembourgish in an official capacity. I knew that I’d be able to get by on English to an extent, but hey, I’m in Luxembourg; I should be speaking a language spoken here, not expecting everyone in Luxembourg to speak the only language I speak. So, I started researching language classes.

User’s Guide: Crime Buster! (Well, almost...)

Last spring while waiting for a bus at Hamilius one Sunday afternoon, a few teenagers appeared, clad in black trenchcoats, piercings, and one sporting a giant Mohawk. They seemed possibly a little bit drunk and definitely a little bit rowdy. Out came a can of aerosol hairspray and a lighter, which they proceeded to use to blow flames at each other and also at buses, spraying flames directly onto the windows where passengers sat on the opposite side. Looking around, Nick and I saw other people sharing furtive glances and moving a little further away to wait for their respective buses. Nobody seemed to know what to do to get them to stop, including us.

We had only been living in Luxembourg for a month or two at this point, so we were at a bit of a loss for what to do to help the situation. Did this constitute an emergency, one worth dialing 113? We weren’t sure. So far, there had been no serious property damage and the teens clearly were just being stupid in their dangerous actions, probably not out to hurt anyone intentionally. I decided that since nobody around us seemed panicked, the non-emergency number would be our best bet. I whipped out my phone to start searching for a number to call. But after nearly ten minutes, I still could not find a better number for the police than the 113 number designated for emergencies.

Fortunately, a bus driver with his wits about him pulled in, yelled at the teens, and (I suspect) notified the police. Minutes later, a police van roared around the corner, sirens blaring. They diffused the situation, and everyone went on their merry way. Except me, who kept stewing about not having being able to find a non-emergency phone number for the police. (Usually, I am an exceptional Googler!)

Early this morning, though, I finally earned a little redemption.

User's Guide: Getting to Paris (and the rest of France) on the Cheap

What do Big Foot, Sasquatch, the Loch Ness monster and the 25€ Luxembourg to Paris TGV special have in common? You’ve got it: none of them actually exist.

At least, that’s what I thought. But then I spent an afternoon clicking around the web site of France’s national train service, SNCF, and made a life-changing discovery: even though the 25€ Lux to Paris special never, ever appears when you try to book a ticket, there actually are ways to get to Paris on the cheap, for very close to 25€.

In addition to that, if you’re willing to make a few extra clicks on the SNCF web site, there are ways to get to other places in France for much less than you’d expect. And there are other inexpensive ways to explore places in France that are a little closer to home, too.

So, Francophiles: read on for my roundup of cheap ways to get to France:

User’s Guide: Medical Care in Luxembourg

I think I am about to enter fun withdrawal. The last month has been a bit insane, in an awesome but crazy busy way. Since my last post, Nick and I have been happy to host several guests. First up was a college friend of mine who I dragged all over Luxembourg, out to Trier and Cochem, to Champagne and then off to Paris. The day after I left her in Paris to catch her flight home, my aunt, uncle and cousin arrived and were given the grand tour of the Grand Duchy. The day they left to go to France, I left for Frankfurt to catch a flight to the US for the weekend to attend a friend’s wedding. I returned home yesterday, a little jet lagged and happily exhausted from my friend’s beautiful wedding and a terrific weekend of catching up with old friends that I adore, and ready to see my husband, who I feel like I’ve only seen briefly in passing for the last two weeks.

The tapenade that caused
all of my ER drama.

So, naturally, not long after Nick returned home from work last night, I gashed my left hand while trying to open a jar of olive tapenade for dinner with a bread knife. (Dumb idea, I know…I often have a tendency to learn things the hard way.)

I had never cut myself that deep before and I was pretty sure that it was too deep to heal on its own under a Band-Aid, so I told Nick I thought we should go to the hospital. I keep emergency numbers on a post-it in a kitchen cabinet, but when we reached for it, it felt a bit silly to call an ambulance for a cut hand. After all, I was in pain but not in any kind of mortal danger. So, we called a taxi instead.

User's Guide: Reading List

Destination weddings rock. For the last week, Nick and I have been enjoying a ridiculous amount of fun in Canada, where we attended a beautiful wedding in Whistler, B.C. In addition to toasting and celebrating our friends’ marriage – and gettin’ down with our bad selves on the dance floor – we ate our way around town, did a little skiing on Whistler and Blackcomb mountains, and had a blast on a guided snowshoe hike where we tasted a few natural forest delights like tree sap and an edible moss called “grandfather’s beard” (as our guide promised, both tasted like tree), and learned about bear scratches…including tips on how to I.D. the scratches that mean you need to run. It was a great final taste of winter.

But this morning, as I rolled my jet-lagged self out of bed to the sound of birds outside our window (which had cruelly been chirping at me to wake up since just before 5am), I realized that I had a lot of Luxembourg news to catch up on. While away, I scanned a few headlines here and there, but being such a long distance and so many time zones behind definitely takes a toll on staying caught up on the goings-on around town.

So, as I’ve been flipping through my favorite English language local news sources, I thought it might be helpful to those of you who are new to town to take a look at my reading list. Then you, too, can stay caught up on all of Luxembourg’s news, from the crazy (e.g. the swan that was shot in Diekirch, or the recent would-be muggers in the Grund escaping to freedom via elevator); to the helpful (e.g. this weekend, there’s a job fair at Luxcongrès; also this weekend, museums around the country are offering free entry).

User’s Guide: Getting Around

The Luxembourg public transit network is hands-down the absolute, very best deal in the country. For a mere 1,50€ – slightly more than the cost of a croissant – you can ride any bus or train within Luxembourg for two hours. Actually, I’ll clarify: you can ride any combination of buses and trains within Luxembourg, as many times as you want, for two hours. You just need to arrive at your final destination before your time is up.

Riding a city bus to the end of the line is a great way to get your bearings if you’re new to town. And long distance buses and trains are a great way to take in the Luxembourg countryside on the cheap.

So, whether you’re new to town or visiting on vacation, here’s what you need to know:

User's Guide: Lux vs. France 2012 Qualifier Tickets (on sale Feb. 17)

I've been trying to figure out how to score tickets to a Luxembourg national team football game for a while now. The Fédération Luxembourgeoise de Football (FLF) web site is not incredibly informative, and online searches are most likely to take you somewhat shady web sites selling tickets for outrageous amounts. Yesterday, however, my luck changed when News352 published an English translation of news from FLF about how to purchase tickets to the Euro 2012 qualifying match between Luxembourg and France, coming up on March 25, 2011.

Tickets are not available by phone or online, but there are a number of outlets where one can purchase tickets starting tomorrow morning (Thursday, February 17) in person. No information, however, on when sales outlets open or about methods of payment. So, I marched myself down to Voyages Emile Weber in Luxembourg to ask a few questions, and then called their location in Kirchberg to confirm sales details at that outlet. So, for those of you planning to buy tickets in the city, here is what I learned:

User’s Guide: Be Counted or Pay Up (Lux Census 2011)

Sometimes I wonder whether my 86 year old neighbor is in cahoots with my mother, updating her on all of my latest activities. Usually once a week or so, as I’m coming or going, I hear the key turn in her lock and just before I’m out of earshot I hear “Jessica! Veehre haahve you beehn?!” I then trudge back up the stairs or back into the hallway and proceed to chat (or listen) for somewhere between 15 minutes and an hour. She is an incredibly kind lady with a fascinating personal story and she’s always been quite generous to Nick and me, gifting us chocolates, containers of ice cream, and at one time even offering me her old collection of well-worn high heeled shoes (they didn’t fit).

Two weeks ago, she stopped me as I was rushing out the door to catch a bus. I explained that I was in a hurry, but she forged ahead anyway, telling me that the census people had visited my apartment. She pulled out all of the documents they left with her and showed me that there were instructions in English. I wasn’t sure what the urgency was, but now I understand why she stopped me. The census is mandatory. If we do not return our census form, we could be fined anywhere from €251 to €2,500!

User’s Guide: Adventures in Grocery Shopping

Last weekend, I braved the masses on Saturday to go grocery shopping at Auchan. Auchan one of the biggest stores in town (read: country) and is pretty much a megamarket of the kind that rivals the biggest Target Greatland or Super Wal-Mart you’ve ever seen. In fact, since there are no department stores in Luxembourg, mega grocery stores like Auchan are actually anchors for the few indoor shopping malls in the country, believe it or not.

Anyway, I enjoy buying bread from the boulangerie up the street and flowers and vegetables from the farmers’ market when I can, but I love, love Auchan. This place has helped me to not only improve my work-in-progress French (via puzzling over labels and trying to decide if the product I’m eyeing is actually the product I want), and it’s the only place in town where I can buy an 18-pack of Diet Coke and a family pack of chicken breasts to trim and keep in the freezer in one stop…so, it’s like a little slice of the USA, right here in Luxembourg. So, if you’re new to town and are overwhelmed by the price of meat (so expensive) or underwhelmed by the over-picked produce selection at the grocery stores in town, hop on the bus and head to Auchan. Just make sure you’ve got a sturdy rolling grocery cart and keep a few of my following tips in mind: